The Right Thing Above My Own Thing
“Character” is easier to recognize than it is to define in a succinct and meaningful way. It’s about mental and moral qualities that define what “normal” is for us. Some have defined it as who we are when no one else is looking.
My way of getting a handle on good character is to define it in terms of three TRAITS: Integrity, Selflessness, and Responsibility. Each of those traits can be further detailed as a set of ATTRIBUTES. (See diagram.) Let’s explore the trait of Responsibility.
Responsibility
When you’re responsible for something, you accept that you own the success or failure of it. No excuses, no passing the buck or blaming others.
A responsible person keeps their eyes focused on the things that matter most. The choices they make demonstrate a willingness to say “no” to personal desires to fulfill their commitments. That also implies they recognize their own limitations and don’t commit to what they can’t deliver.
Attributes of Responsibility
Responsibility gets expressed in the following attributes:
- Reliable – Consistently follows through on commitments. Communicates unforeseen obstacles as soon as possible.
- Dedicated – Doesn’t give up when the going gets tough; makes sacrifices to get the job done.
- Intentional – Pursues purposeful results. Makes choices based on what’s most important.
- Self-disciplined – Able to overcome personal desires for higher purposes, controlling tongue and actions to stay on course.
- Future-focused – Sees beyond the current moment and is willing to sacrifice now for long-term benefit. Also not bogged down by past failures or fixated on past successes.
- Confident – Positive outlook; expects the best of self and others. Realistic about limitations.
Responsible Choices
Character is reflected in the choices we make. Making good (but hard) choices is also how we develop our character.
Responsible choices require us to have a realistic understanding of our abilities and capacities. Making choices that stretch us can be good, but we accept that our intentional choice to be stretched will cost us something. Our dedication and self-discipline will ensure we pay that cost.
Some people with under-developed character are afraid to fail (lack confidence) and never accept responsibility. They never develop their responsibility muscle. Some are people-pleasers, saying “yes” when they shouldn’t and prove themselves unreliable and end up letting down the very people they are trying to please.
It’s not that responsible people never fail, although they’re likely to fail less as their sense of responsibility matures. But they don’t hide their failures, they admit them, learn from them, and work hard to minimize their consequences on others.
The Character Traits article on Integrity is available at https://enlumenls.com/character-traits-integrity/.
The Character Traits article on Selflessness is available at https://enlumenls.com/character-traits-selflessness/.
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